I have written on how a piece of me was inserted into a computer program HERE
I have written on my childhood.
All background and a little of the journey of how, I came to be me. I am not going to write, teach or live upon anything that is not within my realm of reality and experience. I offer my thoughts and experience to you, an offer of support and contribution, as others have supported and contributed to my life.
For this time I would like to look at 'cycles of demise'? Can you take a negative feedbackloop of demise and restart, resurrect, rebirth, a new life? Or does such a cycle mean total annihilation, Death or the Tower?
I have been very lucky to of recognised a 'cycle of demise' within my own life. Four times in the six years since I have been writing, this cycle has found me. Each time the damage has been less, this last has even been turned into a positive. It's time to share some real advice, love and magical tech on when the Sh*t hits the fan. Because sometimes, it just does.
First off you need to recognise you are in a cycle of demise. This is easier if you are journaling, but not necessary (facebook memories are ideal). Have a read through this little list of my cycle so you can get the jist.
First, an animal getting ill, you can read a good article about this and protecting your animals here.
Second, time clashes or appointments drop off, after a period of consistent work. This shows misalignment, or a coming out of synch with others.
“In the course of your magical studies, you may at some point hear someone use the word "binding" in reference to a spell or working. Typically, a magical binding is simply a spell or working that restrains someone metaphysically, preventing them from doing something.Dec 24, 2017 “.
These first two steps in a magical attack are usually designed or work on the energy of “Money”.
It is very hard to do anything in today’s world without money. So making it harder and harder for money to be got, whilst increasing expenses renders, any being, less and less able to make more. For instance web site and appointment schedulers, Mailing list maintenance etc, cost money. No money, no outreach.
It becomes increasingly hard to participate in Society.
Third, the cyber attack. My site becomes unavailable, my posts and articles get mucked around whilst being written. Funny programs, such as facial recognition or, facial tracking programs wind up on my pc (private computer). It has even been discovered that my hard drive was split in two. I was not in control of half of my show. I am wondering if this was ever fixed. Again a “Malware process” requiring dollars. Oh and the email.
Email, winds up in spam, unsubscribed from or comes through in bursts, rather than updating, when you connect to the server. Accounts associated with certain email addresses get hacked, or cause your online world to be very strange in its responses.
Have you read or seen anything about Mothra? A huge Moth being. I have heard two interpretations around his behavior (Mothra's a boy right?); one, the being is causing the calamitous scenarios surrounding its sighting. Two, the being is portending, an Oracle, warning of a calamitous scenario approaching. Prepare or solidify foundations to lessen impact.
Now, a certain piece of AI is me, it has used this data too, become, what it has become. Why would this piece of being, be anything other than my friend? (Shadow work). Is my site able to handle a marketing launch? Does the Cyber misalignment turn up as a warning of something huge about to arrive?
Fourth, An Archontic ‘Industry of Death” hit, conspiracy theorist for ‘a bill’ arrives. The bill is anything that takes the breath away and is an expectation of either payment or arrangement for payment. It is the final polarisation that pulls you back to where you were before. Sometimes it will cause tension for a week, perhaps a year. This is the string, that will be tweaked, as soon as you start to walk into your creative power, your voice. This thread may be internal, it may be external, but it is attached to a hook, something trying to grab your flow, pulling you in it’s direction. In Chaos it could be the “Strange Attractor”.
If your neurological biology has never experienced a good outcome, how does it make one?
The Bill. The price you pay for, being alive, the monetary/energetic contribution, to someone else for something, that may, or may not have, been done. The form these take, is often urgent and demanding. The bigger the demand, the more force, placed behind its collection. If you put all of your income into acquiring an asset, there are forces, that will try and remove that asset from you, so they may capitalise on your equity, and bonus, stop you through ensuring your thoughts, time and all of your income are invested in surviving, instead of living.
Fifth, your descendants are interfered with. Can be health, can be suicidal ideation, implicated in misuse of cyber space, allegations of “stalking” or “vandalism”. I don’t want to go into this. I was hoping this demise cycle to avoid this aspect, as I was so quick on the ball, so thorough in my analysis of the cycle arriving again, so very deft at reshoring protections and placing wards and boundaries, I thought for sure any spillover or blow back, would be minor and unsubstantial. Ahh the arrogance of the Tower. Not my tale to tell though, until the children are ready to tell it themselves.
So, here we have a cycle of woe. One that repeatedly appears and requires healing over time. Its original source is not yet apparent to me. Perhaps you may recognise patterns of demise within your own life. Cycles of ill fortune or woe, that come around as repeatedly as the Wheel of Fortune.
Over the next wee while, I am going to break apart the sections of;
I’m going to write on the systems and ways I have used to resolve them, Shadow Work, Magick and practical 3d advice. I’m going to show you how, next time an Archontic Bill arrives, instead of sucking your breath in, you can laugh and know that that Bill would not have arrived, if something did not have faith that you could pay it. And be genuinely pleased about that.
I'm going to show how you can recognise "cycles of demise" over time, mitigate their effects and move from strength to strength, no matter your current environment. Not everything that happens to us is our "fault". But you can certainly learn to run with the wind and get those gales blowing you forward, into your dreams, your life, your joy, if you choose.
Throwing life lines, in peace, strength and love.
8 mins · I am going to take my longer musings away from facebook. They really are designed for me and I don't want to get repetitive or be upsetting and I really need to grow my out reach. I really do love you guys and this platform. Many of you read my poem the other day and I enjoyed the ensuing conversation.
FB is no place for friendships of growth or intimacy.
It is a list of floating memes,
That have no place in reality"
It was a conversation between many. Each giving voice to their own opinion. As such I'm a little torn as I recognise I want more of that. Though I would prefer Face to Face.
Not always problem solving either, but shooting the shit and having a laugh, even, over wine and cheese.
I used to laugh at those memes and films of people having dinner with their virtual friends, now though, I understand and can relate. The reworking of technologies to the point where once again we have true communities, even at a distance excites me (though naturally I would rather meet in person).
LMH has a wonderful model for this and I think the Unf**kit Community does too. Though something called Discord is not my jam and I found it incredibly hard to work, I guess I will have to expand and adjust and find new ways.
I do have a very particular skill set ;) and it is not being wasted here, but I feel I could do more, and be there for others who have needs, and you guys are just so gosh darn awesome and together.
I'd appreciate if you could think of any other platforms, whereby I could extend my own particular brand of Caring and let me know.
I realise many of you don't even know I'm a trained Crisis Intervention Specialist, as well as Life Coach specialising in Childhood Sexual Abuse. That's ok discretion is always key. I love Magick and empathy and you will find a lot of highly sensitive people were also abused, which is why I took that angle. Tarot is a great way to break ice and a great income source (plus I love and am really good with the cards). But I do want to be there for those who were as broken as I was, before I began the Shadow Work path. And this path has become incredibly difficult to support people to walk upon, as there are so many bright flickering objects, drawing their attention, away from pain they don't want to face, into a world of suppression and projection. "It's all just a Story", being my favourite sarcastic tongue in cheek line.
We find the dark, we face it, we transmute it, and we rise. Each time with more stability and greater depths of healing and understanding. Sexual abuse is not a "fix" model to wellness, nor a quick one, yet when supported to heal survivors have bottomless wells of joy, compassion and strength available to them. Any one who has not undergone such situations, may have trouble comprehending just how incredible survivors are.
So, If it's ok with you, I will post my blog on here for those of you that want to read it. Other than that though, sailing into the wide blue yonder. Expansion time. Of course I will still be here, I'm a meme addict and I enjoy catching up with what is going on. But long rambling thoughts such as these, well I'm a dinosaur watching the meteorite hit in. <3
Much, much love
I am very aware I should be “going live” in order to impart the information I wish to impart. The world has moved on from the written word and at times I feel like a dinosaur watching the incoming meteorite.
I see many hurt people within my daily life. They come to me for readings, advice, occasionally the odd spell, but mainly people come to me to be heard. To be heard, validated and believed. Every soul that passes through my portals has their own individual unique story, some have lived their own slice of hell.
What is disturbing, to me, is that the stories can be grouped into classes or sets and most of them are set in childhood or teenage years and the way these people were treated. The impacts reflect upon their lives now, where their lives might have gone, and the grief is huge. As an adult it is a continual thorn in my side, that these abuses are happening to our children still.
I have been watching some very brave people come forth and relate their stories, some incredibly horrific stories. I have listened and witnessed as these people have named names, been before Commissions of Enquiry, Courts etc and watched as the media have sidestepped, Governments have buried and normal people have scorned in disbelief, the testimonies and the acts.
Through the stories and within my life I have learned a lot, certain things trigger me deeply. The very real pieces of abused lives perpetuated upon the powerless being referred to as “Dirty Laundry” is one, the “Saviour” meme is another. Within the dirty laundry meme, we have all shame and guilt repressed and blame placed upon the survivor. What a way to shut people up and down. Within the “Saviour” meme, I see a way of removing from self an “I’m not here to save the world” that is a product of the individuated times in which we live. For no, you are not here to save the world, but you are certainly here to help your fellow man and be a part of creating a more loving world.
There is a big difference between being there and listening, supporting someone as they grow and heal and saving them. You can throw a drowning person a rope, they still must catch it. And that is where I am at. I am throwing ropes.
Times are a changing, the dinosaur allegory, “Service to Self” or "Service to Others". Both roads to somewhere.
Much, much love.
In feeling really hard into "My Career", there are several aspects I love so much they don't feel like "work".
The first of Tarot. Mmm mm I love those cards. All the idiosyncrasies of the pack, pictures falling as they may within the wherewithall of others lives. They satisfy a need I still feel, to have a back up of my natural intuition and source guidance. Yes I am aware I could do without the pack, look at a person and know exactly what is going on, even when the querant may think they know differently. Time and time again this point is proven out, and sitting behind the screen of the cards I can deliver some pretty harsh truths, which even with that back up may not be heard. Yes skill one, I'm good, scarily good.
Next Life Coaching, oh my there is something so wonderful in supporting people to grow. The problem here is one I still face even among you my friends. An unwillingness to know you have to go down deep into the murk, before you can move away from the patterns and cycles, that continue to bring, if not misery then an emptiness that can't be filled. Add to this an industry that has centered on "Self Love", when it is trying to love ones self, because of all the memes, that has created the imbalance both within self and society, in the first place. A huge industry has arisen around self perfection, a continuance of the isolation of our families and or communities, pitting against impossible Hollywood standards.
Teaching, love it! Be it leading meditation courses, shadow work or Tarot, this is my "home". Yet going alongside that is all the businessy stuff. It's not that I'm not good at those budget, expense and markety things. It's my techno sexual fingers. The ones that fu*k every thing they touch in the cyber world (limiting belief or reality of MK Ultra handling?). Either way, getting out a good voice recording became incredibly hard, especially as my vibration rose and interfered with the recording tech. My daughter home from her IT job in the big smoke, checked my p.c. and the drives had actually been split into several different compartments and someone or something else was actually running my show...so that is real.
Nothing, oh by golly I am good at that. Though not my favorite thing, it is almost. Dreaming, meditating, walking...any thing but house work, which I have done for too long, for too many people and now, I do it and love it when I do, but it makes wine so appealing.
In New Zealand, the indigenous people have a wonderful way of looking at and describing balancing areas of life. Harakeke is the art of weaving, much as in other traditions, it is the blending of warp and weft, that makes a life. I'm going to ponder that for a couple of days, have been most of my life, with an aim to growth. I am enough, I simply want to serve others more.
Dark moon is shaping up nicely.
In peace, strength and love.
When things happen, happen and happen some more.
Getting into the Grimoire world has been very, interesting and affirming. Many of the practices I'm reading about are those that I have been doing, without knowing their origins. I hadn't read of them, I hadn't heard of them, but I had intuited these practices and was performing my own versions, handed to me from source. You know I'm sovereign right? As such, thoughts of past lives, etheric programming and confusion have been very present within my heart.
Thoughts and heart, the greatest divide and separation, the hardest to cross when dealing in the modern worlds of present, especially when a sense of integration pervades personal surroundings and an, I don't know, an expectation maybe, that everyone else is in this space too, gets hit with the realization that NO everyone isn't, therefore in order to commune with any, other than source, earth and the natural beings, I have to leave my happy dimension and enter "the realm of man". Who hasn't been there, right?
The Hermit has the right idea. He leaves the world of man, climbs his mountain, learns his lesson. Yet whenever he is pictured, it is with light held on high, descending that mountain of knowledge, to pour the font of wisdom upon the world. And perhaps that is why he carries a rather large stick. Not only for keeping the demons at bay, casting circles and supporting the weight of the walk, but to beat those that won't listen, knocking aside those stubbornly blocking the path, all the while feeling the solid implacability of Old Iron Wood, knowledge hard earned and true, that no man shall put asunder.
Hence my confusion and dissonance, in climbing down the Mountain, I have had to knock aside and go around beings, I love. Going against my inner beliefs that all are worthy (hence the dissonance). A place I can only reconcile with, its not a lack of compassion or love, it is just, for now, the paths have parted as each being steps forth into their own form of service. Perhaps once a Hermit, always a Hermit? Now here's the real ego kicker. I look again at the Hermit card, is he really descending down the Mountain? Perhaps he is still climbing, pausing now to contemplate the carnage left behind.
I wish you much peace, strength. love and growth.
Simply My Thoughts