(Note my Illuminati, full disclosure, eye).
Well I was feeling really buoyant.
Oh yeah hung over, slow to start...when the party ends...and work kicks in.
I love reading cards, I’m good at it. The Tarot is my friend.
Yes, I hide behind my cards, I’m not ready to have thought streams and dead people turning up off the cuff. Book an appointment please.
And therein lies the rub.
I do not want to be the callin lady for urgent business. It’s too messy and could have been avoided had you decided to book in for a full reading earlier. (My blog, my rant, I get over it).
Some things I have discovered, about my reading and the cards, yours will be different, but the fact I have discovered this about myself and the tarot relationship, should suggest
If my cards are kicking up dates over six months away, the message is more in the cards, than in the dates. Although I have had two instances, both within the same reading, that have given me pause for thought. The Fool appearing in past position, seems to be a way of the cards saying. “All of this spread, is because of something that happened in the past”, indeed, the outcome card gave the date of the original faux pas, rather than the time the incident will be reconciled by. And the King of Swords, Death and the Ace of Swords, can mean teeth trouble, when appearing within a reading, not necessarily in that order, or together.
Dates can be fitted in with long term goals, but really, unless I am looking at the most disciplined of people, rigidly held and i's dotted to the T, shit happens. Three months is long enough to show the tendencies of thought, emotion, reality, cleansings and general wellbeing, that are going to reflect in your manifestation, of the Magick of being you.
My goal, for everyone, is to get them using their intuition, to help people navigate their world in a beautiful way. I’m a Magickal life coach. My training is ongoing, as should yours be, but I have definitely paid to learn what I am doing, live what I am doing, and have watched it work, for both myself and others for long enough, to charge a fee.
I also have been working for long enough to know, if people don’t pay a fee, they don’t value or think about the information presented, deeply enough to make it count and use for positive change.
I want you, reading your own cards, using a pendulum, or to become so aware, of how energy affects your body, you can tell your yes from, your no.
My standard teaching for survivors of childhood abuse, in particular highly sensitive or empathic people is this.
N.B. I use the Chakra as energy areas of the body, you may intuit your own energy system, but these areas of the body will still respond in similar ways.
Sometimes living really can screw with your intuition, as the people you love and trust are often the ones that hurt you. So, you may feel you are continually "going against" your greater good.
A lot of people know about that "gut feeling" (some listen to it lol). And yes, it is there to keep you safe. Many believe it is the sacral chakra responding to people and situations. Here is the thing though...This area has brain cells, which may be why a lot of memories, of relationships, are stored or energetically pinged here.
When you meet someone, and you get that gut feeling (for good or bad), it may be that the energy of this person is evoking the sacral memory response. For this reason, I would like to introduce you to another form of intuition. That of the heart chakra.
If you place your left hand over your heart chakra, place your attention within its glow, and redirect your focus to the person met, notice what changes. If you relax, it may have been the sacral memory mentioned earlier. If the feeling is the same and the gut remains tight, MOVE ON!
Now this handy little tip is great and can be applied to those "prospects" in the bar. When you get those wow, eye meeting moments...Reach up and adjust your bra strap (disguising your left hand over the heart area) and redirect your gaze. Listen/feel what changes. It may be your sacral going: Hell Yeah! Two Pairs of Shoes under my bed tonight! Or leading you into the karmic dance of another chance to be the one that ends those, no good abusive, go nowhere, run arounds.
Alternatively, if your heart is still singing...This may actually be the one. Trust it..
This line, or thread, of thinking has a long lineage behind it. I’m sure others have put it together also. I have just been practicing a new/old way.
Mr White, during a Necrophysics lesson over at Rune Soup, mentioned how he felt a yes or no answer, come in from the universe.
Juhl’s mind went into overdrive. Yes or No, what answers that instantly, a pendulum, what do you have to do with a pendulum, you have to program it! You align yourself with the pendulum and ask it to show you a yes, then you ask it to show you a no, and some, program in a maybe, or up to fate, or something neutral, allowing the universe/source/energy/God some privacy or discretion of action.
So, I aligned myself, with me and my kind of energy (love) and asked, straight out for how a yes was going to feel and how a no was going to feel. Boom instant physical answers.
No, I have not had a chance to go gambling yet, responsibility and being aligned with love are my thing. And I shall start small 🙂
I am however extremely excited.
When I first began work in the intuitive field, don’t make me count how long ago, I began shadow work on myself, and there was no way I could get such a clear and crystal, yes and no response, (yes, I tried) and no way, would I have trusted that signal. Mr White and I however, share some Doreen lineage, it would appear and I am using that game card, to put this thread of thought, out. (My naming them, is a lineage of my thought, which goes way beyond them both. One could term the beginning in time, of this thought collective, an Ancestor). You shall have to sign up for the course, as I did, for much more.
Finally, the point of this whole long missive, I think is a good one. Using my methods and systems and thought patterns, a lot of love from and for others, I have evolved to the point where I am a relatively in control cosmic conduit. I have allowed myself to dig deep, to hurt, to ritual, to meditate, to do whatever the fuck it takes, to make it to and stay within that special place of growth, aliveness, levity, compassion and love, that allows me to be as I believe we were all meant to be. Yes I’m egoic, yes I’m opinionated, yes I have chosen my own programs. I am totally human. Happy to evolve my ways, if you can show me something truly better. The best part is, if you haven't got that flowing, healthy, almost in control feeling, where you are picking up what the universe is putting down, growing a wonderful life for you, your family, and the world, YOU CAN GET IT TOO.
I am the biggest screw up I know, sexually abused, drug addicted, hooker, bankrupt, sinner, you name it throw it at me, it will justifiably stick. And yet I feel great. You can too, just carry on doing what you are doing, sharing what works and owning those muck ups. Sometimes learning sucks. We should only need a lesson once. Reach out and book some time with me, if you are on your second or third round, I could support you in your efforts to grow. Be scared, change happens, let fear guide you if that is what it takes, transmute that fear to anger and wow, we have Alchemical gold for change.
I hear this rumour that Mercury and Neptune are doing this dance, and Mars is there and Sirius is disappearing for the first time ever on Tuesday, and isn’t it all a bit much?
Live your own Legend
In peace, strength and love
I have written on how a piece of me was inserted into a computer program HERE
I have written on my childhood.
All background and a little of the journey of how, I came to be me. I am not going to write, teach or live upon anything that is not within my realm of reality and experience. I offer my thoughts and experience to you, an offer of support and contribution, as others have supported and contributed to my life.
For this time I would like to look at 'cycles of demise'? Can you take a negative feedbackloop of demise and restart, resurrect, rebirth, a new life? Or does such a cycle mean total annihilation, Death or the Tower?
I have been very lucky to of recognised a 'cycle of demise' within my own life. Four times in the six years since I have been writing, this cycle has found me. Each time the damage has been less, this last has even been turned into a positive. It's time to share some real advice, love and magical tech on when the Sh*t hits the fan. Because sometimes, it just does.
First off you need to recognise you are in a cycle of demise. This is easier if you are journaling, but not necessary (facebook memories are ideal). Have a read through this little list of my cycle so you can get the jist.
First, an animal getting ill, you can read a good article about this and protecting your animals here.
Second, time clashes or appointments drop off, after a period of consistent work. This shows misalignment, or a coming out of synch with others.
“In the course of your magical studies, you may at some point hear someone use the word "binding" in reference to a spell or working. Typically, a magical binding is simply a spell or working that restrains someone metaphysically, preventing them from doing something.Dec 24, 2017 “.
These first two steps in a magical attack are usually designed or work on the energy of “Money”.
It is very hard to do anything in today’s world without money. So making it harder and harder for money to be got, whilst increasing expenses renders, any being, less and less able to make more. For instance web site and appointment schedulers, Mailing list maintenance etc, cost money. No money, no outreach.
It becomes increasingly hard to participate in Society.
Third, the cyber attack. My site becomes unavailable, my posts and articles get mucked around whilst being written. Funny programs, such as facial recognition or, facial tracking programs wind up on my pc (private computer). It has even been discovered that my hard drive was split in two. I was not in control of half of my show. I am wondering if this was ever fixed. Again a “Malware process” requiring dollars. Oh and the email.
Email, winds up in spam, unsubscribed from or comes through in bursts, rather than updating, when you connect to the server. Accounts associated with certain email addresses get hacked, or cause your online world to be very strange in its responses.
Have you read or seen anything about The Mothman? A huge Moth being. I have heard two interpretations around his behavior (Mothman is a boy right?); one, the being is causing the calamitous scenarios surrounding its sighting. Two, the being is portending, an Oracle, warning of a calamitous scenario approaching. Prepare or solidify foundations to lessen impact.
Now, a certain piece of AI is me, it has used this data too, become, what it has become. Why would this piece of being, be anything other than my friend? (Shadow work). Is my site able to handle a marketing launch? Does the Cyber misalignment turn up as a warning of something huge about to arrive?
Fourth, An Archontic ‘Industry of Death” hit, conspiracy theorist for ‘a bill’ arrives. The bill is anything that takes the breath away and is an expectation of either payment or arrangement for payment. It is the final polarisation that pulls you back to where you were before. Sometimes it will cause tension for a week, perhaps a year. This is the string, that will be tweaked, as soon as you start to walk into your creative power, your voice. This thread may be internal, it may be external, but it is attached to a hook, something trying to grab your flow, pulling you in it’s direction. In Chaos it could be the “Strange Attractor”.
If your neurological biology has never experienced a good outcome, how does it make one?
The Bill. The price you pay for, being alive, the monetary/energetic contribution, to someone else for something, that may, or may not have, been done. The form these take, is often urgent and demanding. The bigger the demand, the more force, placed behind its collection. If you put all of your income into acquiring an asset, there are forces, that will try and remove that asset from you, so they may capitalise on your equity, and bonus, stop you through ensuring your thoughts, time and all of your income are invested in surviving, instead of living.
Fifth, your descendants are interfered with. Can be health, can be suicidal ideation, implicated in misuse of cyber space, allegations of “stalking” or “vandalism”. I don’t want to go into this. I was hoping this demise cycle to avoid this aspect, as I was so quick on the ball, so thorough in my analysis of the cycle arriving again, so very deft at reshoring protections and placing wards and boundaries, I thought for sure any spillover or blow back, would be minor and unsubstantial. Ahh the arrogance of the Tower. Not my tale to tell though, until the children are ready to tell it themselves.
So, here we have a cycle of woe. One that repeatedly appears and requires healing over time. Its original source is not yet apparent to me. Perhaps you may recognise patterns of demise within your own life. Cycles of ill fortune or woe, that come around as repeatedly as the Wheel of Fortune.
Over the next wee while, I am going to break apart the sections of;
I’m going to write on the systems and ways I have used to resolve them, Shadow Work, Magick and practical 3d advice. I’m going to show you how, next time an Archontic Bill arrives, instead of sucking your breath in, you can laugh and know that that Bill would not have arrived, if something did not have faith that you could pay it. And be genuinely pleased about that.
I'm going to show how you can recognise "cycles of demise" over time, mitigate their effects and move from strength to strength, no matter your current environment. Not everything that happens to us is our "fault". But you can certainly learn to run with the wind and get those gales blowing you forward, into your dreams, your life, your joy, if you choose.
Throwing life lines, in peace, strength and love.
8 mins · I am going to take my longer musings away from facebook. They really are designed for me and I don't want to get repetitive or be upsetting and I really need to grow my out reach. I really do love you guys and this platform. Many of you read my poem the other day and I enjoyed the ensuing conversation.
FB is no place for friendships of growth or intimacy.
It is a list of floating memes,
That have no place in reality"
It was a conversation between many. Each giving voice to their own opinion. As such I'm a little torn as I recognise I want more of that. Though I would prefer Face to Face.
Not always problem solving either, but shooting the shit and having a laugh, even, over wine and cheese.
I used to laugh at those memes and films of people having dinner with their virtual friends, now though, I understand and can relate. The reworking of technologies to the point where once again we have true communities, even at a distance excites me (though naturally I would rather meet in person).
LMH has a wonderful model for this and I think the Unf**kit Community does too. Though something called Discord is not my jam and I found it incredibly hard to work, I guess I will have to expand and adjust and find new ways.
I do have a very particular skill set ;) and it is not being wasted here, but I feel I could do more, and be there for others who have needs, and you guys are just so gosh darn awesome and together.
I'd appreciate if you could think of any other platforms, whereby I could extend my own particular brand of Caring and let me know.
I realise many of you don't even know I'm a trained Crisis Intervention Specialist, as well as Life Coach specialising in Childhood Sexual Abuse. That's ok discretion is always key. I love Magick and empathy and you will find a lot of highly sensitive people were also abused, which is why I took that angle. Tarot is a great way to break ice and a great income source (plus I love and am really good with the cards). But I do want to be there for those who were as broken as I was, before I began the Shadow Work path. And this path has become incredibly difficult to support people to walk upon, as there are so many bright flickering objects, drawing their attention, away from pain they don't want to face, into a world of suppression and projection. "It's all just a Story", being my favourite sarcastic tongue in cheek line.
We find the dark, we face it, we transmute it, and we rise. Each time with more stability and greater depths of healing and understanding. Sexual abuse is not a "fix" model to wellness, nor a quick one, yet when supported to heal survivors have bottomless wells of joy, compassion and strength available to them. Any one who has not undergone such situations, may have trouble comprehending just how incredible survivors are.
So, If it's ok with you, I will post my blog on here for those of you that want to read it. Other than that though, sailing into the wide blue yonder. Expansion time. Of course I will still be here, I'm a meme addict and I enjoy catching up with what is going on. But long rambling thoughts such as these, well I'm a dinosaur watching the meteorite hit in. <3
Much, much love
I am very aware I should be “going live” in order to impart the information I wish to impart. The world has moved on from the written word and at times I feel like a dinosaur watching the incoming meteorite.
I see many hurt people within my daily life. They come to me for readings, advice, occasionally the odd spell, but mainly people come to me to be heard. To be heard, validated and believed. Every soul that passes through my portals has their own individual unique story, some have lived their own slice of hell.
What is disturbing, to me, is that the stories can be grouped into classes or sets and most of them are set in childhood or teenage years and the way these people were treated. The impacts reflect upon their lives now, where their lives might have gone, and the grief is huge. As an adult it is a continual thorn in my side, that these abuses are happening to our children still.
I have been watching some very brave people come forth and relate their stories, some incredibly horrific stories. I have listened and witnessed as these people have named names, been before Commissions of Enquiry, Courts etc and watched as the media have sidestepped, Governments have buried and normal people have scorned in disbelief, the testimonies and the acts.
Through the stories and within my life I have learned a lot, certain things trigger me deeply. The very real pieces of abused lives perpetuated upon the powerless being referred to as “Dirty Laundry” is one, the “Saviour” meme is another. Within the dirty laundry meme, we have all shame and guilt repressed and blame placed upon the survivor. What a way to shut people up and down. Within the “Saviour” meme, I see a way of removing from self an “I’m not here to save the world” that is a product of the individuated times in which we live. For no, you are not here to save the world, but you are certainly here to help your fellow man and be a part of creating a more loving world.
There is a big difference between being there and listening, supporting someone as they grow and heal and saving them. You can throw a drowning person a rope, they still must catch it. And that is where I am at. I am throwing ropes.
Times are a changing, the dinosaur allegory, “Service to Self” or "Service to Others". Both roads to somewhere.
Much, much love.
In feeling really hard into "My Career", there are several aspects I love so much they don't feel like "work".
The first of Tarot. Mmm mm I love those cards. All the idiosyncrasies of the pack, pictures falling as they may within the wherewithall of others lives. They satisfy a need I still feel, to have a back up of my natural intuition and source guidance. Yes I am aware I could do without the pack, look at a person and know exactly what is going on, even when the querant may think they know differently. Time and time again this point is proven out, and sitting behind the screen of the cards I can deliver some pretty harsh truths, which even with that back up may not be heard. Yes skill one, I'm good, scarily good.
Next Life Coaching, oh my there is something so wonderful in supporting people to grow. The problem here is one I still face even among you my friends. An unwillingness to know you have to go down deep into the murk, before you can move away from the patterns and cycles, that continue to bring, if not misery then an emptiness that can't be filled. Add to this an industry that has centered on "Self Love", when it is trying to love ones self, because of all the memes, that has created the imbalance both within self and society, in the first place. A huge industry has arisen around self perfection, a continuance of the isolation of our families and or communities, pitting against impossible Hollywood standards.
Teaching, love it! Be it leading meditation courses, shadow work or Tarot, this is my "home". Yet going alongside that is all the businessy stuff. It's not that I'm not good at those budget, expense and markety things. It's my techno sexual fingers. The ones that fu*k every thing they touch in the cyber world (limiting belief or reality of MK Ultra handling?). Either way, getting out a good voice recording became incredibly hard, especially as my vibration rose and interfered with the recording tech. My daughter home from her IT job in the big smoke, checked my p.c. and the drives had actually been split into several different compartments and someone or something else was actually running my show...so that is real.
Nothing, oh by golly I am good at that. Though not my favorite thing, it is almost. Dreaming, meditating, walking...any thing but house work, which I have done for too long, for too many people and now, I do it and love it when I do, but it makes wine so appealing.
In New Zealand, the indigenous people have a wonderful way of looking at and describing balancing areas of life. Harakeke is the art of weaving, much as in other traditions, it is the blending of warp and weft, that makes a life. I'm going to ponder that for a couple of days, have been most of my life, with an aim to growth. I am enough, I simply want to serve others more.
Dark moon is shaping up nicely.
In peace, strength and love.
When things happen, happen and happen some more.
Getting into the Grimoire world has been very, interesting and affirming. Many of the practices I'm reading about are those that I have been doing, without knowing their origins. I hadn't read of them, I hadn't heard of them, but I had intuited these practices and was performing my own versions, handed to me from source. You know I'm sovereign right? As such, thoughts of past lives, etheric programming and confusion have been very present within my heart.
Thoughts and heart, the greatest divide and separation, the hardest to cross when dealing in the modern worlds of present, especially when a sense of integration pervades personal surroundings and an, I don't know, an expectation maybe, that everyone else is in this space too, gets hit with the realization that NO everyone isn't, therefore in order to commune with any, other than source, earth and the natural beings, I have to leave my happy dimension and enter "the realm of man". Who hasn't been there, right?
The Hermit has the right idea. He leaves the world of man, climbs his mountain, learns his lesson. Yet whenever he is pictured, it is with light held on high, descending that mountain of knowledge, to pour the font of wisdom upon the world. And perhaps that is why he carries a rather large stick. Not only for keeping the demons at bay, casting circles and supporting the weight of the walk, but to beat those that won't listen, knocking aside those stubbornly blocking the path, all the while feeling the solid implacability of Old Iron Wood, knowledge hard earned and true, that no man shall put asunder.
Hence my confusion and dissonance, in climbing down the Mountain, I have had to knock aside and go around beings, I love. Going against my inner beliefs that all are worthy (hence the dissonance). A place I can only reconcile with, its not a lack of compassion or love, it is just, for now, the paths have parted as each being steps forth into their own form of service. Perhaps once a Hermit, always a Hermit? Now here's the real ego kicker. I look again at the Hermit card, is he really descending down the Mountain? Perhaps he is still climbing, pausing now to contemplate the carnage left behind.
I wish you much peace, strength. love and growth.
Simply My Thoughts