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The Thoughts We Whisper

Me making a living

31/8/2018

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​In feeling really hard into "My Career", there are several aspects I love so much they don't feel like "work".

The first of Tarot. Mmm mm I love those cards. All the idiosyncrasies of the pack, pictures falling as they may within the wherewithall of others lives. They satisfy a need I still feel, to have a back up of my natural intuition and source guidance. Yes I am aware I could do without the pack, look at a person and know exactly what is going on, even when the querant may think they know differently. Time and time again this point is proven out, and sitting behind the screen of the cards I can deliver some pretty harsh truths, which even with that back up may not be heard. Yes skill one, I'm good, scarily good.

Next Life Coaching, oh my there is something so wonderful in supporting people to grow. The problem here is one I still face even among you my friends. An unwillingness to know you have to go down deep into the murk, before you can move away from the patterns and cycles, that continue to bring, if not misery then an emptiness that can't be filled. Add to this an industry that has centered on "Self Love", when it is trying to love ones self, because of all the memes, that has created the imbalance both within self and society, in the first place. A huge industry has arisen around self perfection, a continuance of the isolation of our families and or communities, pitting against impossible Hollywood standards.

Teaching, love it! Be it leading meditation courses, shadow work or Tarot, this is my "home". Yet going alongside that is all the businessy stuff. It's not that I'm not good at those budget, expense and markety things. It's my techno sexual fingers. The ones that fu*k every thing they touch in the cyber world (limiting belief or reality of MK Ultra handling?). Either way, getting out a good voice recording became incredibly hard, especially as my vibration rose and interfered with the recording tech. My daughter home from her IT job in the big smoke, checked my p.c. and the drives had actually been split into several different compartments and someone or something else was actually running my show...so that is real.

Nothing, oh by golly I am good at that. Though not my favorite thing, it is almost. Dreaming, meditating, walking...any thing but house work, which I have done for too long, for too many people and now, I do it and love it when I do, but it makes wine so appealing.
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In New Zealand, the indigenous people have a wonderful way of looking at and describing balancing areas of life. Harakeke is the art of weaving, much as in other traditions, it is the blending of warp and weft, that makes a life. I'm going to ponder that for a couple of days, have been most of my life, with an aim to growth. I am enough, I simply want to serve others more.
Dark moon is shaping up nicely.
In peace, strength and love.

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Anger

30/8/2018

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I was asked a really great question about anger and what I meant about it being a "Magnetic Lump of Lead". Here's my answer.
Using anger as motivation for change is a great release, that's what it is for in the now.
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It is the anger of the past, the suppressed stuff, possibly from childhood, often now taking up residence in the sub conscious that is the magnetic lead. It sits down in the bottom of the mind, is often held in a particular part of the body and is like a little satellite, spinning drawing other little pieces of anger to it.
https://www.chinesemedicineliving.com/…/anger-and-the-liver/
We are manifesters, creators, all of the time, it is not a switch off switch on thing. The original anger, or suppressed anger, imagine it as an almost invisible seed, it sprouts and spreads tiny roots and fed, through the experience of life, grows tendrils, that tighten your jaw, your temples your fists and explodes out your mouth in fiery bloom.
Yet it needs those other angry experiences in order to grow...within a garden, plants don't do so well in isolation, they like companions, so the original seed is fed, flowers, goes through the cycle and the anger seeds again. These are the new things we find to be angry about, and we become locked within a negative feedback loop, that proves out the original experience and draws new ones to "prove" our theories.
People you meet may not seem so dumbed down, or as sheeple if you are looking at them with love, but our perception proves out our experience...We see this a lot, and it's a problem in research, where scientists and reporters look for instances that prove their theories rather than ones that don't.
Sometimes we forget that we are 3d and think everything is mind. But when that anger is trapped within our bodies, it is a magnetic toxic poison...allowing the cycles to continues as it is fed.
https://tinybuddha.com/…/how-to-release-the-painful-memori…/ <3
One of the best ways to get rid of "Now Moment" anger is to work up a sweat through exercise. There are also great ways to tap into old anger stores. I wonder...as I watch and move among the world, how the often sedentary lifestyle of many within it, locks and loads the scenarios, playing out around them.
I wish you much love, much peace and much strengt

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shadow time again

28/8/2018

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​As the moon flips, I'm reminded of why I was sent back.
That Shadow Work, I has truly had enough of. 

I loved teaching people methods of letting go, finding true peace as they transmuted and raised their vibrations. But after many years of doing the work myself, The shadows were no longer a place I wanted to dwell within, or assist people out of.

I watch many wounded healers come and go, all elevated upon the new cage thought of "think positive thoughts, think positive thoughts". Indeed I get many trying to tell me how to do my work, or what it is I need. Here's the thing, once you have raised your Cthulhu, embraced and loved it anyway...nothing is going to stop you from evolving and moving on to a permanent level of more stable and loving vibration.
The trick is to maintain full body relaxation as you trance over dark parts of life. Every time you begin to tense, return to the phase before tension, All the magick, all the love, is never going to be enough,until you face, acknowledge the truth of all the aspects of your being. Your thinking a negative thought won't create it, the aspect is already there, that's why you think it.

I understand how hard integrating the Demonic aspect of each of us is, and I don't believe you can't access the heights if you havent plummeted the depths, I do know, that until you have integrated and trans-mutated those deeper aspects of earth and our lives as they are this incarnation, a little piece of magnetic lead will sit within your body. Dragging you down at the weirdest of moments. Swinging emotions out of whack, just as a pendulum or Newtons cradle, that little piece of lead will pull your spirit down and I know you want to soar.
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Any how, I love you all, and wish you peace, strength and much love.
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Better to feel than be a bot

17/8/2018

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​Whilst everyday is a great day to be alive, some days are more beautiful, crisper and more clear than others.
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Today though, is not one of those days. Today is beautiful for other reasons. Today is a day of tears. I have cried tears of laughter as Tin Foil Hat described the Eagle Scouts, tears of sweetness as children showed how easy it was to make friends, tears of outrage as celebrities shared early lives of traumatic abuse, tears of grief for those whose lives have ended to soon and tears of love for an earth, whose luminescence, unveils and reveals it all. And it's only 7:25 am.
Beautiful bitter sweet memories, that make their way from our hearts and pour as tributaries down our cheeks, washing clean and clear our mascara. Because isn't that what emotion does, when properly expressed?
Expressing emotion removes the mask of civility and servitude of attitudes long past their prime and that, for many is a very scary thought indeed. Much of our language express's the need to "reign emotions in", "suffer in silence", show the "stiff upper lip", "don't let them know they've hurt you" and all these sayings contain within them the seeds of our control and lack of. You can only shove so much anger in a box, before it explodes, like Jack n a Box. When a society decides to staunch a flow of emotive words, because the truth of emotion is too raw, and proper response has been forgotten, when we denigrate the words spoken as the emotion behind them is no longer something we can handle, listen to or empathise with, then we are a society that has long past the point of being human. We have entered the Transhuman era.

Computers and AI don't have emotions Nor do Aliens or Angels, emotions are a purely "Earth Realm" thing. If emotions are expressed and heard as they arise, they are not huge cataclysmic things that sweep us away, they are beautiful, respectful moments of humanness. As such emotion should be honored. Instead we see agendas hell bent on stifling, suppressing and training away feeling. When a mob goes bad, the agenda of emotional suppression is fueled again. Angry cries of outrage at mob behavior, which never address the reason why the mob went mob in the first place. Another reason to silence voices, under the guise of inciting behavior. The cycle continues and grows.

For today, I am dedicating my time to feeling everything. Allowing all emotions to sweep through, around and swirl me where they will. I'm going to remember that this is what make our souls so very special, our light so desired.

In peace, strength and love.
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