When things happen, happen and happen some more.
Getting into the Grimoire world has been very, interesting and affirming. Many of the practices I'm reading about are those that I have been doing, without knowing their origins. I hadn't read of them, I hadn't heard of them, but I had intuited these practices and was performing my own versions, handed to me from source. You know I'm sovereign right? As such, thoughts of past lives, etheric programming and confusion have been very present within my heart.
Thoughts and heart, the greatest divide and separation, the hardest to cross when dealing in the modern worlds of present, especially when a sense of integration pervades personal surroundings and an, I don't know, an expectation maybe, that everyone else is in this space too, gets hit with the realization that NO everyone isn't, therefore in order to commune with any, other than source, earth and the natural beings, I have to leave my happy dimension and enter "the realm of man". Who hasn't been there, right?
The Hermit has the right idea. He leaves the world of man, climbs his mountain, learns his lesson. Yet whenever he is pictured, it is with light held on high, descending that mountain of knowledge, to pour the font of wisdom upon the world. And perhaps that is why he carries a rather large stick. Not only for keeping the demons at bay, casting circles and supporting the weight of the walk, but to beat those that won't listen, knocking aside those stubbornly blocking the path, all the while feeling the solid implacability of Old Iron Wood, knowledge hard earned and true, that no man shall put asunder.
Hence my confusion and dissonance, in climbing down the Mountain, I have had to knock aside and go around beings, I love. Going against my inner beliefs that all are worthy (hence the dissonance). A place I can only reconcile with, its not a lack of compassion or love, it is just, for now, the paths have parted as each being steps forth into their own form of service. Perhaps once a Hermit, always a Hermit? Now here's the real ego kicker. I look again at the Hermit card, is he really descending down the Mountain? Perhaps he is still climbing, pausing now to contemplate the carnage left behind.
I wish you much peace, strength. love and growth.